Intentions

For counseling, I was requested to create space in my daily life to do something intentional for myself. That is quite difficult to think of in the moment. For some reason I feel paralytic in my actions when this comes up at a spot of spare time. However, I spent a night snuggled into the mossy green, burnt orange, chocolatey browns, and deep warm purple of my pillows recording idea after idea of nice things to do for me. Selfish, you ask? Egotistic, you're thinking? Conceited, rude, and self-centered cross your mind? I think not. Intentional. Read it and love it. It feels wickedly good, although it is not wicked in the least--when performed in the right doses it is splendidly sanctifying and worshipful to God. You heard it. It is worshipful. And a loving act to my husband as he has convinced me.

My list has me smiling and pleased with myself. Which is exactly what it will hopefully offer as I test out some of the options.

-take a walk
-8 minute abs
-more than 10 minutes of reading
-time to blog (check! :)
-painting
-enjoy a cup of tea
-candlelight
-sitting on the deck
-massage
-bike ride
-play piano
-organizing
-stretching
-online yoga or at the gym
-good music to listen to
-bake/cook something new/fun
-crafty project
-research topics/Bible verses like peace/worry/anxiety/grace/

judging/etc
-buy slippers (check:), buy soft sheets (check:), put on slippers and satiny robe, snuggle in cozy blankets
-hot bath
-lay on couch/bed with relaxing music and take deep breaths
-color in a coloring book
-pray for me/family/Bible study
-prayer walk around house/neighborhood
-buy flowers/a plant
-word search
-yummy smelling candles
-makeover...try new hairstyles for fun or make up ideas
-new outfit combinations
-rearrange furniture
-paint fingers and/or toes

Give me just a minute more and I will blink my eyes like I Dream of Jeanie  and *doyoyoyoing* 50 more ideas will appear. I am getting into the groove of thinking about myself more. It does help that I am reading Boundaries and, though I am not far into the book yet because self-help books more often than not cannot maintain my attentions like a good fiction work has such capability, am being subtly and not so subtly reminded and encouraged to put up some fences for me to be me and love me and take care of me instead of neglecting myself and putting everyone and everything else first which then actually becomes ridiculously selfish because I am not a peaceful calm person to be around but rather stressed and overwhelmed and high-strung and obnoxiously stressed and tight and heart palpitating and brain burstingly exploding with too many to-dos so people are now requesting and begging that I take care of myself. That was my run-on sentence to explain to you why I am better. Trust me. I can now more easily speak shorter. Calmer. Slower. Sentences. Thankful? Me too.

Make your own list of intentional things to do for you. I challenge you. Who has time for that, right? You don't need time. You need a satisfying 15 minutes or half an hour--or even do it while you are doing something else--if you want to accomplish that intentionality once your list is made. You will feel so much readier to live. And to love. The second part makes the living completely worth it. Completely.